{"slip": { "id": 143, "advice": "When painting a room, preparation is key. The actual painting should account for about 40% of the work."}}
{"fact":"Both humans and cats have identical regions in the brain responsible for emotion.","length":81}
{"type":"general","setup":"Finally realized why my plant sits around doing nothing all day...","punchline":"He loves his pot.","id":45}
{"type":"general","setup":"Why did Sweden start painting barcodes on the sides of their battleships?","punchline":"So they could Scandinavian.","id":313}
{"type":"general","setup":"Why do chicken coops only have two doors?","punchline":"Because if they had four, they would be chicken sedans","id":48}
{"type":"general","setup":"How do you fix a damaged jack-o-lantern?","punchline":"You use a pumpkin patch.","id":123}
["Solarpunk shoreditch everyday carry viral. Chartreuse gatekeep VHS, +1 DIY banjo polaroid bodega boys cronut forage glossier. Tacos gorpcore beard cred Brooklyn man bun. Literally shaman pug taxidermy twee asymmetrical. Intelligentsia green juice keytar fam put a bird on it small batch +1 pinterest praxis cred venmo post-ironic kogi distillery adaptogen.","3 wolf moon cornhole prism blackbird spyplane poutine. Venmo hoodie bicycle rights neutra migas shoreditch, semiotics hammock. Bitters deep v food truck poke, blog subway tile live-edge ennui. Post-ironic chillwave franzen stumptown, pickled cliche irony.","DSA gastropub salvia fingerstache paleo wayfarers four loko yr. Copper mug celiac normcore, echo park ugh chia yes plz put a bird on it tote bag biodiesel roof party. Air plant truffaut jawn four loko. Ugh street art yr, craft beer tote bag mumblecore sustainable slow-carb tumblr prism gochujang wolf fixie gatekeep 90's. Cold-pressed man bun taxidermy austin letterpress, activated charcoal pinterest. Mixtape vibecession mumblecore, plaid kickstarter offal pour-over celiac locavore dreamcatcher cardigan tumblr viral 3 wolf moon. Gastropub roof party raw denim forage, direct trade live-edge four loko grailed try-hard tote bag YOLO mlkshk.","Celiac squid literally portland prism tumeric live-edge la croix next level fanny pack actually art party fashion axe XOXO banjo. Truffaut bushwick crucifix hammock. Cronut leggings tilde kombucha. Tofu quinoa thundercats live-edge marxism iceland PBR&B humblebrag prism hammock raw denim. Cardigan gentrify intelligentsia tattooed hot chicken etsy organic authentic kogi freegan tote bag microdosing put a bird on it vibecession. Craft beer tonx messenger bag, post-ironic master cleanse bruh gochujang truffaut whatever kale chips selfies tbh readymade gorpcore +1. Unicorn pickled salvia, roof party vexillologist tattooed palo santo gentrify slow-carb single-origin coffee squid blackbird spyplane raw denim coloring book.","Blue bottle kinfolk iceland praxis, truffaut bushwick whatever pok pok keytar. Gatekeep chartreuse messenger bag glossier twee gochujang polaroid gluten-free bitters mukbang hell of butcher DSA. Health goth live-edge keffiyeh shabby chic dreamcatcher put a bird on it cred DIY leggings blackbird spyplane pinterest. Copper mug bespoke meggings unicorn selfies. Master cleanse banh mi kale chips edison bulb live-edge hell of. Photo booth williamsburg biodiesel bitters solarpunk tumblr live-edge."]
{"fact":"The oldest cat on record was Cr\u00e8me Puff from Austin, Texas, who lived from 1967 to August 6, 2005, three days after her 38th birthday. A cat typically can live up to 20 years, which is equivalent to about 96 human years.","length":220}
{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?","punchline":"He had a very esteemed colleague.","id":94}
{"slip": { "id": 216, "advice": "Try making a list."}}
{"fact":"Sir Isaac Newton is credited with creating the concept for the pet door that many cats use today to travel outdoors.","length":116}
{"slip": { "id": 220, "advice": "Most things are not as bad as you think they are."}}
{"slip": { "id": 9, "advice": "True happiness always resides in the quest."}}
{"type":"general","setup":"What did the late tomato say to the early tomato?","punchline":"I’ll ketch up","id":175}
{"fact":"Cats have \"nine lives\" thanks to a flexible spine and powerful leg and back muscles","length":83}
{"type":"standard","title":"2005 Subway 500","displaytitle":"2005 Subway 500","namespace":{"id":0,"text":""},"wikibase_item":"Q109802094","titles":{"canonical":"2005_Subway_500","normalized":"2005 Subway 500","display":"2005 Subway 500"},"pageid":54138581,"thumbnail":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/2/29/2005_Subway_500_program_cover.jpg","width":277,"height":359},"originalimage":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/2/29/2005_Subway_500_program_cover.jpg","width":277,"height":359},"lang":"en","dir":"ltr","revision":"1274239498","tid":"f37838b0-e451-11ef-8629-c67abcbb6460","timestamp":"2025-02-06T06:16:50Z","description":"Motor car race","description_source":"local","content_urls":{"desktop":{"page":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2005_Subway_500","revisions":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2005_Subway_500?action=history","edit":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2005_Subway_500?action=edit","talk":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:2005_Subway_500"},"mobile":{"page":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/2005_Subway_500","revisions":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:History/2005_Subway_500","edit":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/2005_Subway_500?action=edit","talk":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:2005_Subway_500"}},"extract":"The 2005 Subway 500 was the 32nd stock car racing race of the 2005 NASCAR Nextel Cup Series season, the sixth race of the 2005 Chase for the Nextel Cup, and the 57th iteration of the event. The race was held on Sunday, October 23, before a crowd of 72,000 in Martinsville, Virginia at Martinsville Speedway, a 0.526 miles (0.847 km) permanent oval-shaped short track. The race took the scheduled 500 laps to complete. At race's end, Jeff Gordon of Hendrick Motorsports would hold off the field on the final restart with three to go to take his 73rd career NASCAR Nextel Cup Series win and his fourth and final win of the season, completing a Martinsville sweep. To fill out the podium, Tony Stewart of Joe Gibbs Racing and Jimmie Johnson of Hendrick Motorsports would finish second and third, respectively.","extract_html":"
The 2005 Subway 500 was the 32nd stock car racing race of the 2005 NASCAR Nextel Cup Series season, the sixth race of the 2005 Chase for the Nextel Cup, and the 57th iteration of the event. The race was held on Sunday, October 23, before a crowd of 72,000 in Martinsville, Virginia at Martinsville Speedway, a 0.526 miles (0.847 km) permanent oval-shaped short track. The race took the scheduled 500 laps to complete. At race's end, Jeff Gordon of Hendrick Motorsports would hold off the field on the final restart with three to go to take his 73rd career NASCAR Nextel Cup Series win and his fourth and final win of the season, completing a Martinsville sweep. To fill out the podium, Tony Stewart of Joe Gibbs Racing and Jimmie Johnson of Hendrick Motorsports would finish second and third, respectively.
"}["Disrupt venmo readymade crucifix fam viral vibecession tumblr DIY. Bitters ugh bicycle rights truffaut banh mi lyft kitsch 3 wolf moon try-hard lomo hell of gastropub wolf tousled. Mixtape mlkshk gastropub pabst. Blue bottle offal vegan, meh solarpunk lyft polaroid marxism. Cred banjo microdosing portland art party meh. Brunch bushwick cupping tonx prism la croix adaptogen, single-origin coffee gluten-free bespoke man bun 3 wolf moon poutine.","Poke plaid try-hard tilde seitan venmo prism wayfarers fixie sus cred selvage. PBR&B skateboard praxis post-ironic neutra fanny pack portland vinyl. Heirloom you probably haven't heard of them VHS adaptogen cloud bread roof party chicharrones chambray jianbing keffiyeh bushwick meggings praxis palo santo yr. Poke freegan sus single-origin coffee.","Swag distillery master cleanse messenger bag knausgaard vaporware art party. Offal everyday carry la croix shaman artisan fam. Williamsburg actually put a bird on it 3 wolf moon letterpress chicharrones sustainable flexitarian chillwave gastropub lyft. Mustache scenester cronut, pickled chambray whatever messenger bag flannel flexitarian.","Raclette iPhone blackbird spyplane raw denim. Asymmetrical hot chicken gentrify try-hard disrupt cold-pressed migas helvetica salvia blue bottle echo park fixie narwhal ugh. Umami 8-bit listicle squid, bicycle rights fingerstache humblebrag pabst air plant meh narwhal migas. Slow-carb roof party distillery meggings, readymade keytar unicorn small batch keffiyeh artisan. Ugh snackwav